


Mrs. Hufflepuff

by Charlie9646



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: AU, Cards Against Muggles, Cat, Crack, F/M, Fluffy, Professor Hermione, Severus Snape Lives, parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:33:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23190934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Charlie9646/pseuds/Charlie9646
Summary: A feathered fishing pole style cat toy was clutched in his potion-stained, long-fingered hand. He dragged it around on the floor for the cat, and she chased it as if it was actual food and not some silly toy. Severus let out a small laugh and smiled, seemingly not noticing that Hermione was in his office.
Relationships: Severus Snape/Hermione Granger
Comments: 10
Kudos: 63
Collections: Cards Against Muggles Crack Fest





	Mrs. Hufflepuff

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you Tridogmom for betaing this and helping make it funnier.

  
Hermione didn't know how long it had been going on, but surely not before Flitch had passed away. Mrs. Noris had become Severus Snape’s cat. The grumpy old animal and the sullen professor seemed to have bonded over something—though one could only guess what. 

Maybe he had simply taken to feeding the animal because no else would. Or maybe Severus felt the creature was a kindred spirit—despised and rejected by society. Whatever it may be, it interested Hermione. Partly because, as it stood, the man who she had assumed he was, was not likely to feed an angry cat— who was just as likely to bite you as allow you to pet her.

And yet, Hermione walked in on something more baffling. Severus sat in his office chair, playing with the silver tabby. A feathered fishing pole style cat toy was clutched in his potion-stained, long-fingered hand. He dragged it around on the floor for the cat, and she chased it as if it was actual food and not some silly toy. Severus let out a small laugh and smiled, seemingly not noticing that Hermione was in his office.

Or maybe the Deputy Headmaster was actively choosing to ignore the Transfiguration professor. Normally Hermione would have simply walked away, but for once, she needed the Potion professor's help. 

“Severus?” Hermione said softly, “I need to speak to you about Scorpius and Albus. They seemed to have decided to turn Rose’s hair green and her skin, well, purple. They're both refusing to tell me, or anyone for that matter, what spell they used.”

The man nearly jumped out of his own skin; cat toy tossed aside like it was a viper. “Merlin’s beard, Hermione. Learn to knock on someone’s door or one day you might find something you surely  _ don’t _ desire to to see. But, I know the spell to reverse it,” he muttered. “Draco likely taught him that, unfortunately.”

“Why in the world would he teach it to him?” She asked sharply, “There is no use for it beyond...”

“Getting back at another student.” Severus grumbled, “Potter the first mind you, was the inventor of it. Pointless, stupid, but sure to get some laughs.”

“I'll go fetch Rose, Severus,” said Hermione. “And by the way, muggle cat food is far cheaper than what they sell in Diagon Alley just to let you know. Crooks liked it better anyway.”

“Tell anyone, Granger, and you might learn a thing or two about things that can be put in someone’s pumpkin juice,” Severus snarled, his black eyes with danger reflecting in them.

*************************

Rose stood there next to her mother in the office of the Potion’s master, growling, ” _ He’s _ supposed to help me?! How do we even know he didn’t put them up to this? He always gives me bad grades; he always calls me a know-it-all!” She whined, sounding not unlike her own mother had at her age.“Mum! Surely there must be another option?” 

“Rose! Haven’t I taught you better?” Hermione asked, though she did not expect an answer. “Professor Snape was a victim of this jinx once - I doubt he would tell them to do such a thing.” 

Rose snapped, “Of course you would take his side; you're a teacher!” 

“I am taking no one’s side, Rose Weasley!” Hermione snarled, “Scorpius and Al claim the reason they did this was because you jinxed their brooms, so you aren’t so innocent after all. Now if you don’t stop I will march you straight out of this office, and you can stay like that until you can be polite. Now apologise.”

“Sorry.”

Severus sighed and muttered the counter curse quietly, giving Rose back to her bright orange-red hair and freckled skin. Rose nearly bolted from the room, but her mother caught her by the forearm, ”Don't you think you're forgetting something, Rose?”

”Thanks for your help, mum,” Rose said with a smile.

Hermione growled at her daughter, ”Thank you, but not what I was talking about.”

”I should go unjinx Al and Scorpius’s brooms?” Rose replied with a tight smile, her voice sounding more like a question than an answer.

”You haven't already done that?” snarled Hermione, ”Maybe I should have Professor Snape turn you back into that strange version of lady Hulk. But no, you forgot something you should do before fixing the boy’s brooms. Say thank you to the professor who removed the jinx.” 

Hermione knew her daughter would get the Muggle cartoon reference, but was shocked to find Severus was smiling as if he too understood it. 

”Thank you, Professor Snape, for removing the jinx off me.” Rose said, eyes downcast. ”And not putting me in detention for my own jinx?” She gritted her teeth as if she hoped saying it would make it true.

"Ms Granger-Weasley you aren’t going to get away with it that easy,” Snape said, ”But considering you're a Gryffindor, I'm leaving your punishment to your head of house. Professor Granger, your mother, can come up with something. Hagrid always needs help with his gardens. I reckon he still imports Abraxan dung for them. I will deal with the two in my own house."

Rose looked up her mother with her bright blue eyes as if to beg for kindness, not knowing she wasn't going to get it.

”Two weeks of detention with Professor Snape and no Quidditch practice either.” 

”But Mum! Our first game is in two weeks!”

”You should have thought of that before you decided to curse your opponent’s brooms! You could have killed them!” Hermione snapped, ”And if you keep complaining, I'll make it a month, keep trying me, kid.”

”Fine Professor Granger,” Rose grumbled. ”And to think people say I'm lucky to have a professor as a mum!” She bolted out of the office and slammed the door behind her.

”You're a real Professor Hufflepuff, aren't you?” Severus asked her.

Hermione crossed her arms over her chest, ”Says the person who took in Flitch's cat.”

”Granger, it's a good thing.” He said to her, ”It means you treat them all equally - punishment and praise. I recommended Minerva not hire you because you would be teaching your own daughter, but I stand corrected. She gets no special treatment - none of your house does. And I respect you for that matter, and might even need to take a page from your own book if Slytherins weren't treated so poorly by others.”

”Thank you, Severus,”Hermione said, touched by his words. ”I simply want to be the best professor I can be, and sometimes that means praise and other times it means punishment.”

Mrs. Noris jumped onto Severus’s desk, scattering all of his papers as she did so, bumping her grey head into his hands. 

”I think you have your own Mrs. Hufflepuff, Severus,” said Hermione with a laugh.

“Nope,” Said Severus, “Cats are far more like Slytherins. Temperamental, stubborn and in it for themselves.” 

Hermione could see his scars peeking through his collar, not all Slytherins were in it for themselves - at least not this one. This one was willing to die to make sure both Harry and Draco lived, though he rarely spoke of such things anymore. Right after the war everyone had wanted his story - his side and he kept refusing. Harry was the only reason the man was free; he insisted on telling Severus' story for him. 

Hermione and Ron didn't see eye to eye on many things after the war, maybe that’s why Rose had been their only child, an accident, though not a mistake. They had divorced when Rose was two. Hermione really didn’t date. Work, post-Hogwarts schooling and raising Rose took over her life. It seemed like now that she was thirty five and had time to date, all the good men were taken. At least most were.

“I think that’s what Slytherins and cats want us to believe, Severus, though it’s not really all that true, now is it?”

“Do mind showing me one of those Muggle shops, Hermione? Where I can buy the cat food?” asked Severus, “This Saturday maybe it’s a Hogsmeade weekend after all?”

“Sure, Severus, I would love to.” Hermione said with a smile. She thought to herself  _ and maybe we could do something else as well. _

Severus nodded at her, not actually bothering to say anything—maybe they wouldn’t be doing anything else beyond buying cat food. There were worse things though.

Hermione reached out and pet Mrs. Noris, but the cat was a Mrs. Hufflepuff after all. Didn't the founder tend to bring people together? 

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
